Ugh, what did you have for lunch? Cow blood?

Oh sure, we’ve ragged on Science Daily like all the cool kids do, but it remains an indispensable resource for staying on top of news-breaking science. And every once in while they deliver a priceless gem. To wit: “Bat Breath Reveals The Identity of a Vampires Last Victim.” Oh those stable istopists what will they drop into the mass spec next??

Turns out that vampire bats, like us statesers, have developed a taste for Bos taurus, aka “Bossie”, abundant, delectable wild game notwithstanding. The researchers sampled the carbon signature of vampire bat breath and found a signal that proved that the bats were getting their carbon from C4 grass, via cows, rather than native forage, via their natural prey of javelina and tapir who tend to feed more on C3 plants. I’m not sure if the researchers tested the alternate hypothesis that the bats were washing down their blood meal with a refreshing, C4 adulterated Sparks.

You hop on a plane to Central America and fall asleep waiting for a bus: turn to page 63.

You hop on a plane to New Jersey and can’t fall asleep waiting for a bus: turn to page 103.